Right, it's time for us guys to take a deeply introspective look at ourselves, and be open and honest about the things that we do, or don't do that drive our girlfriends wild. It's not always the big things, the major mess ups we make in life. It's often the small relatively insignificant things that build up and cause us all sorts of relationship problems. That's why when crunch time comes it usually takes us completely by surprise. We sit there looking shocked and amused as if we have been hit by a tornado.
If your relationship is worth anything then your girlfriend is not going to dump you for failing to put the lid back on the toothpaste. If she does, you're probably better off without her. It's more likely to be apparently small personality traits, lack of respect, failing to listen to her concerns and worries, and not being attentive enough that is going to cause you problems. So what can we do to ensure that we hang on to that love of our life, and if we do lose her for any reason, how can we go about getting her back and getting the relationship back onto solid ground?
One of the most important things you can ever do in a relationship is to express your love for your partner. This doesn't mean constantly loading her with gifts. Of course she'll appreciate them, but she wants more than this. She wants those tender moments where you look into her eyes and tell her from the bottom of your heart how much you love her. I certainly know in my experience that it's a great way to melt your partner's heart. That doesn't mean that you should be expressing your undying love 47 times a day, but do it regularly, and choose your moments carefully. What everybody wants is to be loved, and to be seen to be loved.
A major difference between men and women is that women re-evaluate their relationships almost constantly. As a man, if everything appears to be going along nicely, there are no major arguments or troubles, we think that everything is okay. Women on the other hand are far more sensitive to what we often consider minor issues and relationship problems. They are far more in touch with themselves than we are as men. It doesn't mean that we're not sensitive, it's just sometimes we can't see the wood for the trees.
So a really vital factor in a successful relationship is to show your partner that you adore them. Remember to thank them when they've made a nice meal for you. Thank them when they've brought your favourite food from the supermarket. It's those little things that women do which demonstrates their love for us. We need to take a leaf out of their book and reciprocate.
Listening is one of the central aspect of any relationship. You hear all the time how important communication are, and those that say it are dead right. It is not only central to intimate relationships, but to every relationship worldwide. Between individuals, families, communities and indeed countries. If you fail to talk you can be guaranteed that things will go wrong very rapidly. So when your partner wants to discuss something please don't stare out of the window or gaze around vacantly. Look her in the eyes, make gestures to show that you are taking it in. Basically, be attentive and really do absorb the information she is giving you.
Honesty is extremely important to your relationship. That doesn't mean if she asked you, "Does my bum look big in this?", you have to reply "It sure does darling, it's like a bum only bigger!". I can assure you that this type of honesty will do no favours at all. Be as open and honest as you possibly can, but do have some consideration for your partner's feelings. That doesn't mean you should lie, but do give some thought to whether or not your words will have a positive or negative effect on that partner. There is more than one wide of saying something, try to choose the way that causes the least hurt.
With a little time and patience your relationship can be rekindled and flourish. Every relationship has its problems but if you follow the basic steps outlined above you are well on the wide to ensuring that your relationship has the best chance of long-term success.
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